Originally posted by JayMeal

I like girlz

r u crying cuz ur bfs penis is inside u?

Originally posted by JayMeal

I like blokes

finally admitted it

Originally posted by HolzCurlz

Originally posted by JayMeal

I like blokes

finally admitted it

LMFAO!

Blokes lmfao what a word.

Anyway Holz who won, this thread's been going on long enough. xD

2 winners so far i could of died from laughin.. need more random ones!! come on sandin u can do it lol

O.o K I tried lol, my brains dead atm.

Closed.. 4 winners lol.. post them now

w00t w000t! i got lotaa jokes hell wht u think i do at work all day haha, american taxpayers money at wrk!!

headhunter11b said on 07.12.2010 @ 11:12PM:

Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn’t have a lot of money. Between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro.

Murphy said ‘Hang on, I have an idea.’

He went next door to the butcher’s shop and came out with one large sausage.

Shamus said ‘Are you crazy? Now we don’t have any money left at all!’

Murphy replied, ‘Don’t worry – just follow me.’

He went into the pub where he immediately ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky.

Shamus said ‘Now you’ve lost it. Do you know how much trouble we will be in? We haven’t got any money!!’

Murphy replied, with a smile. ‘Don’t ! worry, I have a plan, Cheers!’

They downed their drinks. Murphy said, ‘OK, I’ll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.’

The barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.

They continued this, pub after pub, getting more and more drunk, all for free.

At the tenth pub Shamus said ‘Murphy – I don’t think I can do any more of this. I’m drunk and me knees are killin’ me!’

Murphy said, ‘How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage in the third pub

COULDNT PICK THESE R SOOO FUNNY! HEADHUNTER

headhunter11b said on 07.12.2010 @ 11:16PM:

A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately.

When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his beard which is full and bushy.

“Are you the manager?” she asks, softly stroking his face. With both hands.

“Actually, no” he replies.

“Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him.” she asks, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.

“I’m afraid I can’t” breathes the barman – clearly aroused. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Yes there is. I need you to give him a message” she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

“Tell him” she says “that there is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies room.”

Colbra said on 07.12.2010 @ 10:40PM:

when life seems shitty, just remember u could be a siamese twin attached 2 your gay brother who has a date tonight & you only have 1 ass. :::: I COULD OF DIED FROM LAUGHIN THIS ONE WAS CLASSIC

Sandin said on 07.12.2010 @ 11:13PM:

Well Ok lemme tell you a story

Yesterday I was thinking, god damn I play Prison block too much. Why? Cause I started calling my gatorade bottle a ED. Than I went into my bathroom and saw that my mom cleaned the bathroom and was like "HOLY FUCKING SHIT I GOT A CLEAN TOILET LMFAO" lol, well after I left the bathroom it was a old toilet again. than I went to mcdonalds and the guy that gave me my hamburger looked like celsks avatar so I just drove off lol

notvalid said on 07.12.2010 @ 10:36PM:

A bear and a rabbit were shitting in the woods, when it started to rain. The bear turns around and asks the rabbit:

"Say, Rabbit, does shit stick to your fur?"

The Rabbit was very proud of his plush white hair so naturally he replied: "Of course not!"

So the bear picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass with it.