I beleive while intense training most of us foun dourself in infirmary for more then 20 mins and starts searching the forums well this Joke Section is made for them simply post your jokes here so that the time can be passed with a smile,

Cheers

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th

anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the

wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what

was going through your mind?"

The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to fuck your brains

out, and suck your tits dry."

Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking

now?"

He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."

A guy walks into a sperm donor bank wearing a ski mask and holding a gun. He goes up to the nurse and demands her to open the sperm bank vault. She says "But sir, its just a sperm bank!", "I don't care, open it now!!!" he replies. So she opens the door to the vault and inside are all the sperm samples. The guy says "Take one of those sperm samples and drink it!", she looks at him "BUT, they are sperm samples???" , "DO IT!". So the nurse sucks it back. "That one there, drink that one as well.", so the nurse drinks that one as well. Finally after 4 samples the man takes off his ski mask and says, "See honey - its not that hard."

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There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day. The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem? Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing. Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?! Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup

There are four kinds of sex :

HOUSE SEX - When you are newly married and have sex all over the house in every room.

BEDROOM SEX - After you have been married for a while, you only have sex in the bedroom.

HALL SEX - After you've been married for many, many years you just pass each other in the hall and say "FUCK YOU"

COURTROOM SEX - When your wife and her lawyer fuck you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you've got.

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This couple were in bed getting busy when the girl places the guys hand onto her pussy. "Put your finger in me..." she asks him. So he does without hesitation, as she starts moaning. "Put two fingers in...", she says. So in goes another one. She's really starting to get worked up when she says, "Put your whole hand in!". The guy's like, "Ok!". So he has his entire hand in, when she says moaning aloud "Put both your hands inside of me!!!". So the guy puts both of his hands in! "Now clap your hands..." commands the girl. "I can't", says the guy. The girl looks at him and says "See, I told you I had a tight pussy!".

Man walks into a bar and in the middle of nowhere there is a sign that says beer $2.00, hamburgers $2.50, cheeseburger $3.00, hand jobs $.50.00. The man sees a super hot bartender and asks " are you the one who gives handjobs"? she smiles knowingly and says "why yes, yes I am". He leans over and whispers in her ear "Go wash your fuking hands, I want a cheeseburger".

Last edited by Sentinel 15 years ago

last night on SNL