So who won?

A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped.

"I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'm actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex." The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing.

After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver's seat looking out the window. "Why aren't we going anywhere?" asked the girl.

"Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I'm actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25..."

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and another....

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What a woman says...

This place is a mess! C'mon!

You and I need to clean up!

Your stuff is lying on the floor and

You'll have no clothes to wear if we

don't do laundry right now!

What a man hears...

blah blah blah blah blah C'MON!

YOU AND I blah blah blah blah!

blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah

blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah

blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!

Brock786

The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily. "Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."The General was very skeptical about this explanation but at least he was here so he let the G.I. go. Moments later, eight more G.I.s came up to the general panting, he asked them why they were late. Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here The General eyed them, feeling very skeptical but since he let the first guy go, he let them go, too. A ninth G.I. jogged up to the General, panting heavily Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but Let me guess," the General interrupted, "it broke down." "No," said the G.I., "there were so many dead horses in the road, it took forever to get around them."

dont care if its finished here are a few jokes

I had a super wank the other day............ it was just a normal wank but i wore a cape¬

If a women speaks and no man is there to hear her is she still wrong?

It is known that the new man u striker hernandez has his nicname in the back of his shirt, chickarito, which means little pea. this is spreading throught the united team. next week nanis shirt will bear the name 'cheating cunt; meaningcheating cunt!.

My Joke Site

ive got my own joke site. check it out^^. I think youll like some of em

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

lmfao

chingy: 5 points

terry913: 4 points

babycakes: 3 points

marty420: 2 points

jigsaw: 2 points

hanako: ???

snakeman:0

pogmaithoin: 1 point

killer2310: 2 points

johnnybozo: 1 point

crackjaw11: write your favorites down

skidmore: 3 points 1 extra to make 3 cause itz extra funny

Chingy is winning comp goes off on 10/11/10

heres a few:

there was a guy he wanted a sandwich went to a restaurant and asked him the guy said no he went ill pay u 10 pound a 100 pound or a 1000 just 4 the sandwich the waiter says u think u really want it the guy says yes so the waiter r u sure he says yes so the guy gets 1000 pound and says giv me it so the waiter givs him it the guy goas err its tastes like shit the waiter says i warned u once i warned u twice i wiped my ass on that slice.

play wiv a toy play wiv a nife play wiv me ill play wiv ur wife