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Prisonblock funniest person

15 years ago  #111
Level 14
Status: offline
Prison: South Dakota
Incarcerated: 15 years, 9 months
Posts: 4,711

Originally posted by motherpeek little johnny asked for a bike for xmas. his dad says we can't afford it m8! we have a $100k mortgage and ur mum lost her job! next day little johnny is packed and ready to walk out the door. his father asks where he is going! little johnny replies..... i walked past ur room last night and i heard you tell mum you were ready to pull out! then she told you to wait cos she was coming to! and i'm not staying here on my own with a $100k mortgage and no fucking bike!!!!!!

that supposed to be a joke

15 years ago  #112
Level 10
Status: offline
Prison: Putnam
Incarcerated: 16 years, 7 days
Posts: 883

Originally posted by Brock786
Originally posted by Chingy yay im second

dont u wanna be first

i have already 2 metal fans

15 years ago  #113
Level 4
Status: offline
Prison: New Jersey
Incarcerated: 15 years, 9 months
Posts: 23

Originally posted by Stonecoldrobber That jus wasted 3 mins of my life

so were agreed lol

some people really suck these days 
15 years ago  #114
Level 4
Status: offline
Prison: New Jersey
Incarcerated: 15 years, 9 months
Posts: 23

lol

Originally posted by mizpeg Very Short Story

Man driving down road.

Woman driving up same road.

They pass each other.

Woman yells out window, PIG!

Man yells out window, BITCH!

Man rounds next curve.

Man crashes into a HUGE PIG in middle of road and dies.

Thought For the Day:

If men would just listen ...

some people really suck these days 
15 years ago  #115
Banned
Status: offline
Prison: Putnam
Incarcerated: 15 years, 10 months
Posts: 1,032

Originally posted by Brock786
Originally posted by Terry913 ok heres how it goes a blonde gets pulled over by a police officer he says license and registration mam, she says gosh i wish u guys would get ur act together yesterday you took my license away and today you expect me to show it to you

not funny

like ineed ur shit anyways

 
15 years ago  #116
Banned
Status: offline
Prison: South Dakota
Incarcerated: 16 years, 2 months
Posts: 246

The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't knowanything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

ok Sweetheart Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'theprison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is put theprisoner in the prison.

And then they made love for the first time.

Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes butthe girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives hima suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recentlyborn foal.

Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.

She nudges him and says, Honey, the prisoner escaped again.

Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,OKAY!

15 years ago  #117
Banned
Status: offline
Prison: South Dakota
Incarcerated: 16 years, 2 months
Posts: 246

one day on a little boy b-day he asked his mom if he can have a shower with her.

so the mom said "ok, but don't look up or down."

so they went in the shower and of course the boy lookes down and said "mommy what is that?"

" oh," said the mom."that is my garage."

then he lookes up and says" what are those?"

so the mom says " those are my head lights"

later that day he asked his dad if he can have a shower with him. the dad said "ok, just don't look down."

so the boy lookes down and asked "what is that"

the dad said "that is my limo"

later at dinner the boy says "you better turn your head lights on mom, beacause daddys limo is going in your garage

" old joke but still cracks me up"

15 years ago  #118
Banned
Status: offline
Prison: South Dakota
Incarcerated: 16 years, 2 months
Posts: 246

A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town.Things were getting hot and heavy when the girl stopped the boy I really should have mentioned this earlier but I’m actually a hooker and I charge $20 she said. The boy just looked at her for a couple of seconds but then reluctantly paid her and they did their thing.

After the cigarette the boy just sat in the driver’s seat looking out the window Why aren’t we going anywhere asked the girl

Well I should have mentioned this before but I’m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25

15 years ago  #119
Level 4
Status: offline
Prison: New Jersey
Incarcerated: 15 years, 9 months
Posts: 23

lol

Originally posted by skidmore The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't knowanything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

ok Sweetheart Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'theprison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is put theprisoner in the prison.

And then they made love for the first time.

Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes butthe girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives hima suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recentlyborn foal.

Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.

She nudges him and says, Honey, the prisoner escaped again.

Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,OKAY!

some people really suck these days 
15 years ago  #120
Level 14
Status: offline
Prison: South Dakota
Incarcerated: 15 years, 9 months
Posts: 4,711

Originally posted by skidmore A boy and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town, doing what boys and girls do on back roads some distance from town.Things were getting hot and heavy when the girl stopped the boy I really should have mentioned this earlier but I’m actually a hooker and I charge $20 she said. The boy just looked at her for a couple of seconds but then reluctantly paid her and they did their thing.

After the cigarette the boy just sat in the driver’s seat looking out the window Why aren’t we going anywhere asked the girl

Well I should have mentioned this before but I’m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25

no jokes of net

old jokes soz not countin

mizpeg is in permanent iso so not countin hers

 

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