Husband and Wife on 10th anniversary. The wife undresses and says: "What did you think when I stripped 10 years ago?"He says: "I wanted to fuck your brains out and suck your tits dry".She says: "What are you thinking now?""Looks like I did a pretty good job!"

One day about a month ago, President Bush was looking for a call girl. He found three such girls in a local lounge, a blonde, a brunette and a redhead.To the blonde he said, "I am the President of the United States. Now how much would it cost me to spend some time with you?"She replied, $200."To the brunette he asked the same question. Her reply was $100.He then asked the redhead.Her reply was, "Mr. President, if you can get my skirt up as high as my taxes, my panties as low as my wages, get that thing of yours as hard as the times, and keep it rising like the gas prices, keep me warmer than it is in my apartment and screw me the way you do the public, then believe me, Mr. President, it isn't going to cost you a damn cent."

A man has 6 items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap and a towel from the Holiday Inn.The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

Teacher: "Fred can you find me America on the map please?"Fred: "There it is!"Teacher: "Now, Johnny, who discovered America?"Little Johnny: "Fred did!"

the husband said to his wife , can i cum in your ear , she replied NO ILL GO DEAF and the husband said , well i cum in your mouth and you never seem to shut the fuck up

ok thats all i got hope it did somethin